Huh.

So, I got home from my first two-show day in a long time, and started browsing on the 'net. Like you do. And after Googling exes and discovering that a jackass with whom I went to high school actually shares a name with some political dude named Steve Cohen... I looked up this guy I had a crush on for like 6 months in high school. Back then he was maybe 5'2 and had a rattail... you remember rattails, right?

But, in my defense, despite the fact that we were the same height and he had the rattail, he was really hot. Whatever. Anyway... he's a record producer now. Like on the way to really doing big stuff. And I thought, "Shit. I am such a loser. What the hell am I doing with myself?"

And then I thought, "I am dressing at Steppenwolf... which is really fucking cool. And I am making my mark, and I am working my way honestly up the theatre food chain..."

And then I looked a bit further and realized that without the contributions of said rattailed hottie's father, the world may never have seen the likes of the following albums: Michael Bolton's "Soul Provider," "Greatest Hits 1985-95," "Timeless: The Classics," "All About Love," and "Hits 1985-1995:Best of the Best Gold;" Kenny G's "Silhouette," and "The Ultimate Kenny G;" and Peabo Bryson's "Can You Stop the Rain," among others. This father of Hottie is clearly the devil. And therefore Hottie is clearly Spawn of Satan.

And I am totally working at the freakin' Steppenwolf. So, like, whatever. Sources say that Malkovich only smokes fancy expensive French cigarettes. Who knew?

That is all.